Games People Play

Why don’t you, yes but – MCQ

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1. What unconscious motive often drives the problem-offerer in “Why Don’t You – Yes, But…”?

A. To genuinely find a practical solution

B. To prove their situation is uniquely impossible

C. To invite empathy without risking change

D. Both b and c

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2. What is the primary payoff for the problem offerer in this game?

A. The relief of being rescued

B. The validation that their problems are unsolvable

C. The sense of being special through struggle

D. Both b and c

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3. Which racket feeling is most likely sustained by the problem offerer in this game?

A. Resentment

B. Helplessness

C. Anger

D. Pride

4 / 14

4. For the Rescuer, what is the hidden payoff of repeatedly offering solutions?

A. A sense of being wise and needed

B. Relief from their own problems

C. The thrill of proving others wrong

D. Control over resources

5 / 14

5. Which is the existential position of the Rescuer, at the start of the game?

A. “I’m OK, You’re Not OK”

B. “I’m Not OK, You’re OK”

C. “I’m Not OK, You’re Not OK”

D. “I’m OK, You’re OK”

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6. What kind of ulterior transaction keeps the game alive?

A. From the Rescuer: “I can help you” — From the Victim: “Nobody can.”

B. From the Rescuer (social level): “Here’s a useful suggestion” — From the Victim (psychological level): “Thank you.”

C. From the Rescuer (social level): “Let’s solve this together” — From the Victim (psychological level): “I want to do this alone.”

D. From the Rescuer (social level): “I am on your side” — From the Victim (psychological level): “I am all alone.”

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7. Which belief sustains the Rescuer continuing the game?

A. “If I don’t fix this, I’m useless.”

B. “My worth comes from being admired.”

C. “Others will only value me if I have answers.”

D. All of the above

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8. Which of these is a conscious way to step out of the game as Rescuer?

A. Offering more and more creative solutions until one sticks

B. Asking directly: “Do you want ideas, or do you want me to just listen?”

C. Refusing to ever give advice again

D. Ignoring the person completely

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9. Which of these is an effective way for the problem offerer to step out of the game?

A. Stating what they need clearly

B. Evaluating every suggestion that is offered

C. Thanking the Rescuer profusely

D. Collecting advice to prove no one understands them

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10. Berne defines “con” as unconscious, ulterior communication. What is its purpose?

A. To openly state one’s needs directly

B. To invite the other person into something that looks worthwhile but hides an ulterior motive

C. To resolve conflict by building trust

D. To avoid taking responsibility for one’s own feelings

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11. If a client asks a therapist “Will I get better?” and the therapist says “Of course you will!”, what would you say is the therapist’s gimmick or weakness?

A. The patient’s need for sympathy

B. The therapist’s weakness of not wanting to disappoint the other

C. The patient’s refusal to accept advice

D. The therapist’s insistence on being right

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12. What happens at the Switch stage of games?

A. The players return to their Adult ego states

B. The original problem is solved with clarity

C. One player suddenly shifts position, creating surprise or contradiction

D. Both players acknowledge their hidden motives

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13. In the Crossup (X) stage, what typically occurs?

A. Mutual understanding and repair

B. A period of confusion in which control shifts

C. A calm review of earlier actions

D. The termination of the game with no emotions involved

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14. What is the predictable payoff for both players in games?

A. They feel relieved and satisfied

B. They gain insight into their hidden motives

C. They both end up experiencing familiar painful emotions and reinforce script beliefs

D. They develop a stronger therapeutic alliance

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Curriculum

Exercise

Check if you play this game

For the Rescuer — Tick all that apply:

For the Victim — Tick all that apply:

Journaling prompts

If you are often the Rescuer:

If you are often the Victim in a Yes, But game

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